I'm NOT attracted to my husband!
Thu, 07/09/2009 - 06:40
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Today I told my husband I was not attracted to him. I said this very calmy after we were discussing hour our needs are not met.
He was very hurt, and he does not show this side of him. I admit I have a problem being attracted to my husband. He does not take care of himself as I would like. I feel very guilty about feeling this way, but I can't help it.
Is this fixable? Did I do wrong? I hope I can work with this, and we can make our marrage work.
I try to look my best for him. Am I a bad woman for feeling this way and telling him?
I can't say if you are right or wrong but I can say that you can't always help how you feel. And feeling the way you do doesn't make you bad- it makes you human.
Not being attracted to someone who doesn't take care of themself is natural. Likewise, feeling guilty about it is also natural.
I can't wait to read the responses to this because I'd like to know the answers to your questions too.
Definitely you are not a bad woman. But you are a good and lovable person to him, coz if there is no love and afection on your husband, then you will not be thinking him at all. So there is much love and affection on him, but the way of expressing it, could be a problem for you.....
really ... open statements .. will always hurt more and more ... if ur not attracted to attracted to ur husband .. pls induse ur feelins....like a slow poison .....
Wow, is there something that he can do to make you attracted to him again? I mean, by taking care of himself. Is he out of shape now? Doesn't shower what?
I would say work on it and maybe you can get the attraction back.
I would hate to think it's because he is out of shape. I know a lot of men who start looking elsewhere when their wives get out of shape, I think it's 100% wrong.
Did you say sorry to him after what you just said? Honesty is very important in all relationship. However, if it hurts your partner then, you should say sorry. I know he would understand. Just tell him what your concerns are so he would be able to do something about it.
I admire you for your courage in telling him that. I wish I could do the same to my husband.
BTW, I went to that link in your thread. It was an eye-opener too. Thanks.